What to Get the Couple Who Have Everything: A Guide to the Kimye Baby Shower

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Kim and Kanye are expecting! Given that this is probably one of the most exciting times in all of our lives (I never said this article wouldn’t be depressing), it’s important to consider what you’re going to bring for the happy couple come the baby shower. But what do you get a couple who have a combined net worth of over $100 million?

If you watch Keeping Up with the Kardashians, probably the only thing you ever want to give Kim is a mom who is less self-obsessed than her daughter. Because really, what else does she need in life? She even has Lord Scott Disick as a brother-in-law (it’s not quite the same as being his baby mama, but sometimes sisters have to make sacrifices for each other), so she pretty much wants for nothing. And then there’s Kanye West. Not only does he have talent (and makes sure no one forgets it), he has pretty much everything else, too. Unfortunately for your wallet, it’s still good manners to get the glowing parents-to-be a baby shower gift. Here are some ideas.

  1. Connect Four – In the grand tradition of their fabulous, musically-talented (okay, that’s an understatement) parents, the “Kimye” baby and Blue Ivy Carter will be competing in Connect Four tournaments. Blue Ivy’s been in boot camp since that SNL skit aired about her birth, so little Kimye’s got some catching up if she wants to avenge her father’s defeat!
  2. Boy Meets World boxset – I learned everything I need to know in life from Mr. Feeny (that sounds like a Facebook group from back in the day… oh wait), and I know the value of friendship thanks to Shawn and Cory. I’m sure Kim and Kanye would pay for the real actors to come and reenact the show for their baby if he/she wanted, but in a world where Girl Meets World is about to exist, I just want to make sure the little tyke has access to the important things in life.
  3. Convince Justin Timberlake to make music again – We’ve lived in a world without JT music long enough, and I hate the thought of another baby being brought up not knowing the wonders of his falsetto.
  4. Pegasus – If it was good enough for Hercules, it’s good enough for Kim and Kanye’s baby.
  5. Tickets for Virgin Galactic – The gift ideas above all have been for the baby (well, okay, Justin Timberlake’s music is a gift for anyone with ears), but here’s something for Kim. Having a baby in space just sounds less painful for some reason. Also, Kate Winslet will be there, and her presence automatically makes everything better.

There you have it, five possible gifts to bring to Kim and Kanye’s baby shower (please coordinate with other inconnu readers accordingly). As for baby names, I’ve gotta go with my girl Shannon Woodward and say “Old” is the way to go, partner. It’s humorously ironic, weird enough for a celebrity, and it stops that “K” name tradition in its tracks.

– Gabrielle Costa, Staff Writer

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About Gabrielle Costa

I'm just a girl, standing in front of the TV, asking it to love her. I'm also always on the internet, usually here: @gabriellemcosta.

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